Maggie the poet
I love when you’re reading multiple fics by the same author and you start to spot all the phrases and adjectives they like to use
I'd say this man has no original ideas and he just buys good ideas from other people with his dad's emerald mine money, but that's not true, it's just that all of the original ideas are a hot shitty garbage.
Rip Twitter, I won't miss you.
Good time to remember that his space company is called SpaceX.
He has 1 shitty idea.
opossumofanxiety asked:
I need to write an essay for school but I'm terrified that it won't be very good and this fear is ultimately preventing me from doing the assignment. Any advice?
neil-gaiman answered:
If you don’t do it it won’t be done. So you have to pretend you are someone who can do it and start the essay. Then you have to pretend you are someone who knows what they are doing and finish it. Then you have to pretend you are someone who has never seen the essay before and you need to read it with new eyes and revise anything that needs improving.
As a teacher, I will tell you what I tell my students.
1: If you're afraid of writing a bad essay, don't be. Everyone writes a few stinkers.
2: There is almost no chance of you writing the worst essay your teacher has ever seen.
3: It is literally your teacher's job to help turn bad writers into good writers. If they just complain about a bad essay without helping you get better, they're the one who sucks, not you.
4: All first drafts are hot stinky dog poop. All of them. This is why the gods give us red pens and second drafts.
5: We would rather see a bad essay than no essay. Most of us actually love bad essays, because it shows us exactly where you need help and exactly what we need to do.
6: This goes for all art forms, really, but you might find that what you think is "bad writing" just turns into "your writing style."
7: Pretend that your subject matter is way cooler than it is (I know how interesting essay topics aren't.) and infodump as if you were rambling to your best friend. You can fix grammar later.
8: Good luck, we believe in you! 👍👍👍
thinking about how 17th century audiences must’ve gone feral at the you/thou switch
#it’s me. i’m 17th century audiences
@thestaples you and all of us, buddy
nobody likes the “bad boys” who insult and degrade their partners while wearing pastel polos with popped collars, people like REAL bad boys who wear leather jackets and take a lot of care in how they shape their pompadour and carry around stiletto switchblades and care about their communities and ride a motorcycle and rebel against the government and says stuff like “NOBODY insults my gal” and gets in fistfights with dudes who catcall their girlfriends. THOSE bad boys are the guys everyone wants.
We want the boys society says are bad, not actually bad boys
Classic bad boys went against the mainstream masculine society of their time. They embraced attributes that were considered girly: longer hair, use of hair products, appreciation in their appearance, enjoyment of art and music. They rebelled against the notion that as soon as you left high school you needed to work a respectable job, get married, and have 2.5 children. They were bad because they didn’t follow what society said a man should be, and that’s why it was attractive
Neil would probably post this, but he doesn't have social media. So here's a gift link to a story I know a lot of you will want to read.
I feel like if humans swallowed rocks like birds do to help grind up food we'd have so much fun with it.
Can just imagine all the girlies on tiktok going "I know this is a bit controversial but I honestly love using limestone as a gastrolith. Not only can you readily forage it but they are just so pretty when smoothed out after regurgitating them"
and then all the comments would be like " girl 😭 😭 calcite dissolves in stomach acid!! Just use quartz if you want a pretty gastrolith like 💀"
I like this site. Y’all just shotgunning counterfactual timelines
But what if it was all a dream
This is more unsettling. I know it's there. I know it should be there. I know this pristine landscape is hiding its horrors like teeth.
yea I'm not gonna lie I don't like this.
not joking I would kind of like to brutally murder whoever thought it was a good idea to take away clicking on a person’s name to see their reblog and make it borderline impossible to get to the original version of a post without spending ten minutes scrolling with ctrl f
Helpful tip:
If you have the post date option turned on you can click the date and it will take it to the original post like before. It's annoying, unintuitive, and harder to click but it should work on mobile or desktop
this is the most ridiculous possible workaround thank you SO much tumblr user suffusionofyellow for sharing